In contemplative prayer, one characteristic is that you must deliberately slow down. Another reaction that I have found is in thinking that I have to do something with the time I meditate or it is not productive, I must fill in the hole of time that I just created with something, anything. This feeling becomes all consuming, if not addressed. After each of my meditative blogs on contemplative practices, I recommend that you consider reading them three times, each time growing deeper in awareness and time for the Holy Spirit to overshadow you with grace (energy of God).


Holes are those voids in your life that cause you to ache because you do not feel the same, or whole. All humans try to fill these holes, like someone who has a chronic back pain and can’t find relief, even with strong medications. Be careful what you use to fill your hole.

Here are a few types of holes you might have experienced as you meander down your path of life.

  • The loss of a spouse or a child
  • The loss of a mother or a father
  • The loss of a close friend
  • Divorce
  • Divorce with acrimony
  • Fighting (verbally) with a spouse over the more inconsequential things in your lives
  • Caregiving for someone with Dementia or Alzheimer’s disease
  • Loss of a job
  • Being robbed of money or reputation
  • Rape
  • Friends throwing you under the bus for their own advancement or pleasure
  • Failure to reach your potential in the job or lack of promotion
  • Adultery (your own) or your spouse
  • Fornication and living with someone else
  • Anger with parents over how to live your life
  • Anger with children over how to live their lives
  • Living with someone who hates you and any and everything you do
  • Phobias of any kind, such as fear of dying or going to Hell
  • Fear of anything that is paralyzing behavior (severe claustrophobia)
  • Hating what you consider to be God and blaming Him for your lot in life
  • Being content to remain in your ignorance about God because it takes time and energy
  • Being taken over by Satan and slowly descend into Hell on earth

These are only a few of the holes that you might have dug for yourself or find yourself in, right now.


  • Fill the holes with drugs or alcohol
  • Fill the hole with watching television
  • Fill the holes by yourself
  • Fill the holes by blaming God, others, anyone but you, for your misfortunes
  • Fill in your holes with unauthentic love
  • Fill in your hole with hatred, one which you cannot release from your inner self
  • Hate yourself and so hate others around you
  • Refuse to get professional help for anger mood disorder or Borderline Personality Disorder, blaming your spouse and family for your depression


  • You can get out of your hole, if you know how
  • Realize that you are in a hole and want to get out of it
  • Be aware of Kubler-Ross’s stages of grief and use them
  • Be aware that the wages of sin is death to the Spirit
  • Pray that you may not be led into temptation
  • Fill the hole of grief with the love of Christ


  • Contemplative prayer will not take away the pain of being in a hole, even if you can’t get out of it immediately, but it will allow you perspective to realize that Christ is sitting next to you. Christ was in a hole in the Garden of Gethsemane and asked the Father to take away the pain. He conquered his human doubts and pain by joining with the will of the Father. This did not make the pain go away but allowed him the strength to complete his mission.
  • Contemplative prayer allows you to sit in silence and solitude on a park bench in the middle of winter and wait patiently for you to calm down enough to listen to Christ, sitting right next to you.
  • Contemplative prayer is quietly and patiently receiving transformation from Christ from your false self to your new self, which will allow you to carry your cross daily.

Use this Scripture as it was intended, to help each of us have in us the mind of Christ Jesus (Philippians 2:5) and give us the strength to place ourselves in the healing presence of the Trinity.

The Praise of the Father.

25 At that time Jesus said in reply,* “I give praise to you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, for although you have hidden these things from the wise and the learned you have revealed them to the childlike.

26 Yes, Father, such has been your gracious will.

27 All things have been handed over to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and anyone to whom the Son wishes to reveal him.

The Gentle Mastery of Christ.

28 “Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest.

29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves.

30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.”

How can taking up the burden of filling a hole be considered light by Christ? The yoke of the World can be these holes that you experience in your life and over which you do not have control. The heavy yoke of which Christ speaks is taking up our cross daily, using the love of others, as Christ loves us, to fill the hole. Understand, Christ won’t take away your heavy yoke but will help you carry it with his own heart next to yours.

Our hearts are restless, says St. Augustine, until they rest in Thee.

Praise to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit, now and forever. The God who is, who was, and who is to come at the end of the ages. Amen and Amen. –Cistercian doxology


The first time you read the blog, just read it as you normally do but make a deliberate effort to read it slowly and don’t rush just to finish it. The second time read it even slower but try to pick out one idea or theme that you want to explore. You may wish to write it down in the space that I have provided for your notes. I have heard it said that the third time is the charm. The third time read it again but this time as prayer. Take ten minutes or more to reflect on the story. Look at the photo of the park bench for a few minutes. What is the Holy Spirit trying to tell you? You don’t have to do anything now but wait.

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